Thanksgiving day

Today is Thanksgiving so I prayed that I would keep my mouth shut when I didn't have anything nice to say. I succeeded for the most part. I do find though that when I stuff my feelings away that I have a tendency to become depressed. So, is it okay to voice my anger? I didn't think I was a control freak but the more I wonder about our future I want to cry. I battled tears most of the morning and into the afternoon. What is M waiting for?? I told everyone tonight that DISH is in my name and next time I get the bill it's getting canceled. We have plenty of videos. Last time we got rid of cable I felt closer as a family. I want to start cutting out all things that aren't necessary. I am even willing to cancel Internet for the good of my family. Why didn't M sacrifice before he got us into this mess? Shouldn't M be looking for another job? Should I look for a job? I couldn't put N in daycare. I have about $500 saved for a rainy day. I thought I would pay off a bill with that. Now I'm thinking I will be buying Christmas gifts. I'm pretty sure it's going to be a pretty skimpy Christmas around here. When I told C today he said he didn't mind, that he'll buy what he needs. It was very humbling for me to hear that. He did tell me too that Bobby is going to start paying him cash. It won't go through M first. I'm very happy about that. M already owes him $1,200 because he has used the money to pay his bill instead of giving it to C. I told G he needs to get out and look for ANY job on Monday. M said it was nice that M is paying for G's schooling that he won't be using. I just said that maybe G could pay for it once he got a job. I know the economy isn't going to get better. I heard someone on the radio the other day talking about how we (the U.S.) are making so much money. It has to stop. Our money will soon be worth nothing. That is when we will be dependent on other countries that we owe money to and that will usher in the one world currency. Kind of scary how close we are to the end times, isn't it? I am thankful to be a child of God. I am thankful for four healthy kids. I am thankful for a mom that gave A money so she could stay in taekwondo for at least another month. I do not like eating humble pie.